One day my six numbers will come up. When that happens, I’m going to open a bar in the centre of Birmingham. It’ll be called Turings. And it will not be like other places.

Firstly: no cash. On entry you swipe a card and get a sort of heavy metal token thing, which you give back on the way out. Secondly: no bar. It’s all table service.

Every table will be a big electronic screen. Sort of like a Microsoft Surface, a big iPad, that sort of thing. On the table your group of friends can do a whole bunch of things. The most obvious one is order drinks: you can flick through the list of drinks available, choose one, and “throw” it across the table to the person who’s paying for this round. They charge it to their token, which the table recognises is resting on the table (this is what the token is for), and a waiter brings your drinks on a tray.

Your table can choose their own music. Above each table is a directional speaker, so music chosen by your table is only audible to your table.

The table’s got a web browser in it, so anyone can pull up Wikipedia to settle arguments, send messages to Facebook or Twitter, play games across the table.

Every table has a bunch of USB sockets and leads for common phones.

I’d love to run this place, even despite the opinions of jwz and Yahtzee that running a bar is not as much fun as you think: really, I’d want to drink in it, and the manager runs it. All I need is six numbers. 1, 6, 7, 19, 24, 30. It’s not much to ask.

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More in the discussion (powered by webmentions)

  • Ryan McDonough responded at twitter.com But, can it run Doom?
  • Alex Murray responded at twitter.com
  • Francesco Ponzin responded at twitter.com And it turns out that I wrote up the plan years ago. kryogenix.org/days/2013/09/0…
  • Avocational Hacker responded at twitter.com Brilliant and so ahead of it's time!
  • Francesco Ponzin responded at twitter.com
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com Still waiting for my lottery winnings to make it happen :-)
  • Sleigh Bells Ex Machina responded at twitter.com 😭 oeis.org/search?q=1%2C6…
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com ha! my lottery numbers are that special that they're not even in the OEIS! this explains why I haven't won yet
  • John Sear responded at twitter.com I mean - it's not a million miles from Wetherspoons - using their app. No mini speakers yet though! Are you the brains behind Tim Martin? ;)
  • John Sear responded at twitter.com Also, unless it's going to be a chain, it feels like the first Turing's should be on Canal Street in Manchester.
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com goodness me I hope I'm not. :)
  • Kristen Pol responded at twitter.com
  • John Sear responded at twitter.com
  • Sleigh Bells Ex Machina responded at twitter.com
  • Jessica Rose responded at twitter.com I support your needlessly complex dream
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com It'd be such a good bar! Probably sell decent roast potatoes as bar snacks, too.
  • Olu responded at twitter.com
  • Duval #YangGang2020 responded at twitter.com