On Losing Weight

Dr Ellis wants to be thinner:

I am getting to the point where I’m truly, utterly, totally tired of being really overweight. I want to lose it. But every time I think about what that’s going to mean, I shudder. We’re not talking about losing ten pounds here. We’re talking about losing almost a hundred pounds. That will bring me to or below my ideal body weight. It means at least two years of eating really shitty food. Don’t fucking argue with me—healthy food is tasteless and bland and it sucks. I like spaghetti, chili, chili dogs, chili burgers, cheeseburgers, chili burgers with cheese, steak, cream-based sauces, chocolate milkshakes, iced blended mochas, fajitas, Mexican fried ice cream, orange chicken…the list goes on and on.

I don’t quite have to lose a hundred pounds, but I do need to lose about fifty. That’s a lot. That’s a year of dieting. Like Josh Ellis, I hate healthy food. And eating little portions of everything. And feeling hungry all the damned time. I like pizzas, and sandwiches, and spaghetti. And for breakfast I’ve just had a damned milkshake, and it’s not a patch on a bowl of cereal and four pieces of toast.

Probably I ought to give up smoking, too, but one thing at a time.

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